The Unsung Hero of Sexual Liberation, Beate Uhse

Beate Uhse in one of Germany's Beate Uhse shops.

Before Playboy released its debut or Kinsey published Sexual Behavior in the Human Male, a woman was also at work in the origins of modern sexuality, Beate Uhse.

Beate Uhse had been a German Luftwaffe pilot, but after World War II, former Luftwaffe pilots were forbidden from flying. Uhse was a widow with a children and in desperate need of money. She began selling door-to-door products to German housewives. Uhse found herself more intrigued listening to these women than selling to them. She unofficially began a kind of counselor for marital problems, many of which arose from lack of education in or access to contraceptives.

Uhse had been raised in a progressive family. Her mother was one of the first female doctors in Germany and spoke openly and in great detail with Beate about reproduction and sexual intercourse.

Uhse and an employee preparing mass mailing catalogs. From Beate Uhse Archive.

With this background, Uhse began writing pamphlets called "marriage guides" and mass-distributing them through the mail in 1947. The original marriage guides explained the rhythm method, but as greater numbers wrote to Uhse with sexual questions, her topics and offerings increased.

Aphrodisiac oils and stimulating creams. Beate Uhse Archive. 

By 1951, the Beate Uhse Mail Order Company was established. Uhse sold condoms and booklets on sexual health and reproductions through her small mail order catalogs. Her and four employees used phonebooks to mail millions of catalogs across the nation. The response was overwhelming.

Uhse's catalog also included lingerie to stimulate marital relations. Beate Uhse Archive.

 During the Nazi regime, strict moral codes resulted in little to no dialogue about sex education and reproduction. Uhse received many questions from her customers, including "Can you get pregnant from kissing?" and "Do children come out of your bellybutton?" Baffled at the widespread ignorance, Uhse hired a doctor to answer and response to customer questions in a section of the Uhse catalog.

Uhse included photos of herself in her catalogs with the caption "Happy Wife and Mother". Beate Uhse Archive.

Uhse straight-forward manner gave an air of legitimacy that later competitors struggled to achieve. Uhse could relate to the housewife. She never hid her name or the pride she took in being a wife and mother. Sexual education and the accessories she sold were not prurient but aides to a healthy and happy marriage.

Annual mail order sales reached 7.3 million deutsche marks, and in 1962, Uhse created physical store to sell her catalog items, which became the first sex shop. Despite her wholesome approach, by 1992, Beate Uhse's companies had been indicted over 2,000 times.

Lingerie & Empowerment

Whether you are undressing in front of a new partner or celebrating a twentieth anniversary, beautiful lingerie can improve confidence and creating beautiful gift-wrapping for a lover's real present. However, the most frustrating thing I hear from women looking through the lingerie in our store is "Oh, I love this. I just wish I had someone to wear it for."

For a moment, consider the implications of this statement. When single, I've found many women treat themselves differently than attached. Sexuality and self-worth are not contingent upon Facebook status, but instead, should persist at all times. 

Why is lingerie so often thought to be for partnered women or women on the prowl? Perhaps that's why it is often despised by feminists. In the early 20th century, bras were a source of freedom for women. Corsets had been the prior standard. In the time of first wave feminism, bras were a welcome alternative, allowing for greater physical movement, including the ability to participate in sports.

Image credit: bobster1985

Second wave feminism brought unique challenges to lingerie, as its focus centered in more in de facto equality than de jure. Advocating social equality in the home and workplace meant treating biologically different genders the same, which required feminists to understand or at least theorize on the differences between men and women.

While attempting to minimize the differences between men and women, I believe much was gained, but something was also lost, the ability to have pride in our genders and sexualities. To varying degrees, we have breasts and vaginas, and all the 'power suits' in the world can't change this.

A matching bra and panty set that fits well and makes you feel beautiful offers far more than the potential for others sexual arousal. Lingerie can also be a gift for yourself, a secret offering to the goddess you are. Being proud of your sensual self and feminine form.  I find it is invigorating to dress for a career, earn the salary the I deserve while finding intimate ways to maintain a connection to my sexuality.

In sum, I advocate loving your tits and your vulva, and if wrapping them up in lace helps, do it.

TSA & Your Toys

Whether you're about to leave for a romantic weekend or traveling for business, many of us have accessories that assist in intimacy or destressing at the end of a long night. Here's an easy guide to what can come in the carry-on (in case of layovers?), what should be checked, and what to leave at home.

Lube or Other Liquids: It's got to follow the TSA's 3-1-1 guidelines, which means 3.4 oz max container in 1 quart plastic bag and 1 bag per person. Note this means the container, not just the amount of liquid in it, needs to be 3.4 oz or less.

Take the batteries out.

If it's sex-related, BAG IT. Whether checked or carry-on, don't risk a stranger's greasy fingers on items destined for your precious orifices. 

 Packing through Security. From the TSA website: "Travelers should be aware that prosthetics worn under the clothing that alarm a walk through metal detector or appear as an anomaly during Advanced Imaging Technology (AIT) screening may result in additional screening, to include a thorough pat-down." This means if you choose to wear your small rubber strap-on and fabric harness (both able to be in carry-on) through the security line, be prepared to have TSA staff need to see it and/or inspect it in person. Better to put in a carry-on and change into your gear later.

Size may matter. I do want to believe TSA has seen it all and will display a level of professionalism, but who knows. If you drop $200 on a great Lelo vibrator, you certainly don't want to miss your flight getting it shipped, so just in case, 7" and under is recommended for vibrators and dildos. Dildos should be small and made of rubber or silicone. Cloth restraints and nylon or cloth harnesses are also fine.

There is some debate about the origins of the 7" rule. TSA forbids many tools above 7" but was not referring to toys. However, TSA has stated that toys large enough to be 'club-like' are forbidden. Many have erred on the side of safety and surmised that above 7" is more likely to appear 'club-like.'

Piercings. If your nips are massively gauged or your dick could be mistaken for a metal rod, prepare to be inspected at security or take the piercings out in advance. That being said, I've left my small but hidden piercings in for 13 years without problems. It's your call.

A Note on Latex. Remember to add talc powder and store it in a plastic bag. Also, it needs to be stored outside of direct sunlight in a cool, dry place. Depending on your travel this could mean in checked luggage or stowed away at the bottom of your backpack.

Iffy Items. If you argue with TSA, you probably won't win, so try to avoid bringing anything but the 'must haves' in your carry-on. 
Supposedly, handcuffs and leather floggers are fine. 

TSA rules are about making travelers feel safe, and hopefully, be safe, too, so appearances can be a dividing line. Your spring-loaded mouth gag looks more dangerous than your plastic heart-shaped cuffs.

Check it or leave it at home. 
E-stimulation Devices.
Razors and Wartenberg wheels.
Vibes or dildos above 7".
Metal dildos. 
Harnesses or BDSM gear with metal. 
Nipple clamps.

Traveling while Trans
If your driver's license or identification says male and you do not appear to be that gender (or vice versa), be prepared to be questioned or need to explain. Even if your gender appears the same as on your license, the Patriot Act allows airport staff to see a database of all identifications, so be aware that you may still need to explain. If in transition, travel with a letter from your therapist.  Please be calm about it. This is a post-9/11 world, and it's part of their job. However, if staff harasses you, calmly ask them to stop, get their name and information, and write later to request action be taken and more employees given GLBT-sensitivity training. If in transition, travel with a letter from your therapist. 

Use Common Sense.  Educate yourself on the news and culture of your destination. It is not the right time to bring your collection of the Sauna Boys series to Russia. The Middle East reacts differently from San Francisco during Leather Week.

Don't cause a ruckus at the airport. Calmly voice your objections. You don't do anyone any good by proving what a scene the woman with the dildo stash can make.

If you are harassed or believe TSA staff has acted inappropriately, e-mail TSA-ContactCenter@dhs.gov. Or call, write, Facebook, tweet, blog, contact the news stations. Just be sure to BITCH about it.

DON'T LET ANYONE SHAME OR EMBARRASS YOU ABOUT YOUR SEXUALITY.

Cassidy Queerface Shares on Make-up, Drag and Burlesque

One of the many faces of Cassidy Queerface

 Oklahoma's Cassidy Queerface stands out as an icon in GLBT performance art. In 2010, Queerface organized the Bang Bang Variety Show in Norman. While Bang Bang shows continue to express a new perspective on  "punk rock gender f*ckery" in Bible belt, Queerface has expanded into performing with Oklahoma burlesque troupes, including Dust Bowl Dolls, 7 Deadly Sins and TnT Burlesque.

Oh, also, she's hilarious and an f-ing sweetheart, so I asked her a few questions.

Cassidy Queerface as male persona, Dick Tater

Queerface performs in many roles, including Misty Snatch and Dick Tater, and you never know what to expect from any of her characters. Fake blood, leather harnesses or strap-ons may be on stage, but Queerface's genuine smile brings unexpected sweetness to her performances.

Ruff Life: You are such an outrageous figure on stage. What is the day-to-day life consists of?

Cassidy Queerface: Day to day life for me is actually probably more normal than most people realize, but maybe I just have bizarre friends so it seems more normal. Usually I have a day job that takes up most of my time. I was a pharmacy tech for 11 years, ha. Right now I don’t, though, so my “work” is just planning, organizing, promoting shows, developing my own numbers, and creating costumes. I end up spending a lot of time cuddling with my cats and watching Netflix and sneaking off to go have fun with friends, though.

RL: How did you begin performing?

CQ:  I had performed in some church dramas when I was religious (your laugh here,) but I began performing as an adult as Magenta in a Rocky Horror troupe my friends had put together. Fast forward to the next year and I went through a really rough patch in my personal life and needed a creative outlet. I had always wanted to be a drag queen but figured having been born a woman disqualified me from that. Then I saw Fauxnique had won the Trannyshack competition in San Francisco. I figured if a bio female could win a drag queen contest, then surely I could perform as one. So I started picking out songs I wanted to do and building my costume collection and learning how to do drag makeup. Then Madame D, the queen running the Hilo drag show at the time, let me have my debut and stay on the show with them for a bit. My original performances were still full of weird and quirky concepts. I didn’t dance as much cause I still felt super awkward with the way my body moved. I still do a few of those original numbers, though, they’re just more polished now.

RL: What were your original performances like?

CQ: My very first number was as the Queen of Hearts with a fake battle axe to the Yeah Yeah Yeah’s “Heads Will Roll.” And I think “Bleeding Love,” the one where I pull bloody intestines out of my dress to a sappy love song, was within my first month of performing.

 

RL: You didn’t originally begin doing burlesque as a female, right? What prompted the decision to move into that?

CQ: I didn’t start out doing burlesque at all. I started as a faux queen and I was so covered it was hilarious. I’ve always enjoyed nudity in art, but hadn’t really been a huge fan of strip clubs, ever, then I saw the Suicide Girls burlesque tour. Suddenly there were these girls stripping to music I loved and having actual theatrical concepts to it. I didn’t see any burlesque live until many years later and then performers just kept popping into my view. I loved it. It was like subversive sexiness. Or like drag and stripping had a baby. I loved the art form but thought I could never do it cause I hated my body and I’ve never been a great dancer. Eventually I got a little more bold after seeing some burlesque girls that were thick like I was and worked my way towards naked. First performance I refused to not wear slimming tights and my waist cincher for the entire number, though.

RL: Okay, I've got to ask about your incredible make-up. It's always so over-the-top but flawless. How did you learn to do your make-up?

CQ: I have been playing around with makeup since I was young, but I started being more serious about it when I was 20. I started reading detailed tutorials, collecting pictures of looks I wanted to try, and experimenting with color and blending. I met the gay soulmates, Austin Tatious and Chase Vegas, a year later and I learned a lot from them as well. Austin actually gave me my first live drag makeup tutorial to give me an illustration of some of the stuff I couldn’t seem to get down. It helped a ton.

RL: Favorite make-up tool or item?

CQ:  I couldn’t live without my makeup brushes. I can do without a lot of things and make drug store makeup work a lot of times, but brushes are essential. I’m also a huge fan of fake eyelashes.

RL: Any drag secrets women could learn from?

CQ: Drag secrets for women. Let’s see. I think just knowing your body is your canvas helps a lot. You can paint it up or dress it up however you’d like. Women are scared of doing anything “unnatural” most of the time, and I like that drag celebrates the illusion you can create with things. As far as makeup, blending is essential and be careful when wearing vivid lip colors. You need lip liner to contain it, and if you put gloss on it will smear quickly. I had to learn how to do makeup that would last 4 or 5 hours without budging, so longwear formulas are a savior, as well as primers for your foundation and eyelids. As far as attitude, paint up and dress in a way that you feel gorgeous and you’ll probably gain quite a bit of confidence.

RL: You recently shaved your head, and somehow make bald look glamorous. Anything prompt the shaving?

QF:  I shaved my head the first time a few years ago cause I had a pink Mohawk and the edges were shaved so far down that I didn’t think it would be good for job interviews I had to go on. But I loved it so much I kept it for a while. Then grew it out, hated it, and shaved it again. I have very low tolerance for hair I can’t take off whenever I want to. I’ve been spoiled by wigs for 4 years. Plus, I get to be “edgy” and “daring” with my hair without doing a damn thing. I’ve always enjoyed androgyny, and now I kind of like wearing mine on the outside.

RL: Running out of questions, but I have always wondered who your style or performance icons are?

QF: I have a lot of icons. Amanda Palmer is probably the biggest one, for her style, business model, artistic integrity, bizarreness, etc. I also really love Freddie Mercury, David Bowie, Karen O, Nina Hagen, and Emilie Autumn. They all share the fact that they just are flamboyant and dressed so abnormally, but also were perfectly gorgeous and comfortable in their weirdness and with androgyny.

If you'd like to see Cassidy Queerface in action, she performs every last Thursday at the Drunken Fry at 10 pm with the Dust Bowl Dolls, every first Thursday at the 51st St. Speakeasy with the Dust Bowl Dolls, every second Friday at the Hilo with Bang Bang, AND Friday, Saturday and Sunday September 27 - 29th at the Boom with TnT Burlesque.

Whew, that's a busy badass lady!